| At A Glance | |
| Author | Laura McCarthy |
| Contact | laura_popple@yahoo.co.uk |
| IAM | Lozza_mc |
| When | A month ago |
| Artist | Myself |
| Location | Penrith, Cumbria UK |
A couple of months later, I had started researching what I would need for play piercing myself. I posted in the 'Inexperienced' forum on IAM, stating my willingness to learn, and got a few replies from people who knew better than I. The first step for me though, was discovering what the policy was for the disposal of sharps containers in my local area.
My son was due his jabs, and when I took him up for them, I asked the nurse about the disposal of sharps containers, and she informed me that the pharmacy was in charge of all things relating to that. So once my son had stopped crying, I went to speak to the woman at the pharmacy.
The pharmacy was full of people awaiting their prescriptions, and I walked through the crowd to the counter. The woman came up and asked if she could help, and I basically asked straight out:
"May I buy a sharps box please?" (I didn't know whether you purchased or were given)
"You don't have to buy them, we give them out and when full you bring it back to exchange it for a new one." And she handed me a black tube with the ominous biohazard sign on it. I was just about to thank her, then thought I would push my luck...
"Is it possible for me to purchase... needles?" I asked. I didn't realise until I had started speaking that I didn't even know what needles to ask for. (Dumb me there)
"We don't sell needles, but we do give out a pack that contains needles, syringe, alcohol wipes and a sharps container, if you could just fill in this form."
With that she handed me a form. I started to fill it in (Initials, D.O.B, town of residence, drugs using...)
When I read the 'drugs using' section, I almost laughed out loud. The pharmacist noticed my reaction, and asked what was wrong. I basically said that I didn't do drugs (cue shocked looks by mentioning drugs in a room full of people). She then screwed up and threw away the piece of paper, and then asked what I would need needles for. I just said 'Play piercing' and left. I dread to think what the poor woman thought!
Right, after getting my sharps box, I then looked at exactly what needles I would need, and then purchased some off the internet. I used a site recommended by a friend. I ordered some 25g 1 inch needles, a box of 100, all pre sterilized.
The day they arrived, my partner was at work that evening, so I would be able to play by myself without anyone around. I knew that for my first time, I wanted to be alone, as to make my own mistakes and get the feel for it without anyone criticising me. So I put Callum to bed, made myself a drink, got the gear together, and mentally prepared myself.
I got an old towel under my arm; I had heard this was a good idea to catch any blood that may spill. I also had alcohol wipes (and had washed my arm a few minutes prior) and wiped my arm down. I opened the box of needles and looked at them. They were small, but I thought that I would go ahead with it anyway. I separated a needle from the strip, and opened it. I took the plastic cover off and placed that in the sharps box. I sat staring at the angled end of this sharp small needle. In just a moment, I would be willingly piercing my skin. After a few deep breaths, I then pricked my arm. It stung, I only went a millimetre in, barely breaking the skin, and I dropped the needle with the shock to what I had done. I put it in my sharps bin. A small droplet of blood was bubbling around the wound. I put pressure on the hole for a moment to curb the bleeding, and then readied myself to start again.
The next time, I had a steady hand. I opened another of the needles, took off the wrapping and the cover, and pushed it through my skin. It stung, but it didn't really hurt, and then suddenly, there was no resistance. It had stopped stinging. I felt elated; I couldn't believe I had done this! I had managed to push the needle through my skin. After taking a moment to compose myself, I tried to push it underneath the skin. It looked so unreal, seeing my skin ridge up above where the needle was travelling. I then had to try pushing it through the skin again. I saw my flesh whiten where the tip of the needle was putting pressure on the underside of my skin. I pushed the plastic end, and the tip of the needle broke through my skin again. It was through, and I just sat there in awe of what I had just done.
I felt a rush, but it wasn't the normal rush I felt when I have been pierced by Gillian. This one felt more mental, rather than the full body rush I get when getting an actual piercing resulting in jewellery. It was an awesome sense of accomplishment. I felt like I had pushed my physical boundaries by deliberately causing 'harm' to myself, and I could do it without traumatising myself. It took a few minutes for me to compose myself, and then I did it again.
The next needle was slightly trickier, as I had the previous needle still in my arm, and I had to manoeuvre my hand around that. As I was play piercing my upper arm, I couldn't move it as much as I would have thought. When I broke the skin the next time, I didn't push it back through soon enough, so that once it had broken through the skin on the way out, there wasn't enough needle to keep it from staying put, so there was a bit of blood leaking from the exit hole. This did not put me off however, and I managed to eventually get 7 needles into my upper arm.
After sitting with them in my arm for about 15 minutes, I decided to take them out. Slowly, I took each one out and immediately disposed of them into my sharps container. It did sting once again as I removed them, but that's all it felt like, a sting. In all honesty I didn't expect any blood, just a little around each wound and that would be it, but when it started to trickle down my arm I found it a shock. Luckily, there wasn't too much blood, otherwise I am sure I would have panicked and would have lost the edge I was feeling.
I was astounded by what I felt I had accomplished. I felt like I had done something extraordinary, even though I am sure that many people would think it was normal in everyway. Some of the best advice I got was do not feel you have to use many needles in one session. I used 7 in one go, and I felt like that was my limit. But sitting there looking at 7 needles in my arm, and looking back at pictures, I still feel amazed at what I have done.