4 months ago I had the pleasure of meeting Sean when I took my little sister to get her first real piercing. I was immediately impressed with how he dealt with her during her piercing....and a little later how he dealt with me. Since then I have gone to no one else to get my piercings done. Sean is the first person I've met who has made the flesh pulls available in this area. And before I met him, I never thought twice about doing something like that. It just wasn't me. Surprising how quickly your views can change when it's accessible. I'm always looking for ways to push myself. To see just how much I can tolerate. And I'm the first to admit that I am a big wuss. My tolerance for pain has definitely increased in the past few years....but I'm still a big baby about it all. I've been looking at BME for years and while the pulling and the suspensions always intrigued me....it wasn't anything I though I would ever d o. I mean...putting hooks in myself?? Yea, right. Not gonna happen.
At A Glance Author Kel Contact Kel@bme.anon IAM Kel When It just happened Artist M.O.M Suspension Group Location Glen Burnie, MD Yea well....obviously it did happen. I got do to my first pull on my birthday. I was pitiful. It amuses me now. Since then I've done 2 other pulls. Basic back pulls. Nothing outrageous. Then I got to help Sean and the other members of M.O.M raise their suspension tower. That in itself was an incredible night. I still never thought I'd be using it. Things changed a little bit after I got to see a live suspension. It was just amazing. I couldn't get over how people could push themselves like that. So I got home that night and I started thinking about suspensions and whether I really wanted to do one.
I gave Sean a few weeks notice and we set up a time. I wanted it to be private. My reasons for doing it are still very private for the most part. We set the date as Memorial Day. No big reason for that date except that I had off....so did Sean...and I had off the following day. I spent the week or so prior that this getting ready so to speak. Cutting back on soda's, drinking more water...smoking a lot less! Attempting to eat better and get some rest. I also sat there every night and spent a good amount of time thinking about why I was doing this.
Finally Memorial Day was here. I'm the first to admit....I was a cocky bastard on the drive up. No doubts that I couldn't do it.....but then again....we weren't there yet. I made sure I ate a decent meal a few hours beforehand. I also stopped and picked up some fruit and water. I had my best friend Missa with me as she was going to coach me through it. We made it to Sean's and sat around for a while. I was relaxed and calm...until he asked if I was ready to get some hooks put in me. Then the nerves kicked in. We discussed the weight issue and decided 4 hooks would be enough. So in the end I did a 4 point suicide suspension. I stood there and got marked, laid down on the table and tried to prepare myself. I always got really nervous with the hooks when I did my pulls. For some reason....getting this set wasn't as nerve wracking. Although the outer two did hurt a bit. Damn me and having tough skin. Gotta make things difficult. My plan once the hooks were i n was to go clear my head and make a phone call. There was someone I wanted to talk to before I did this.
Sadly.....all I got was voicemail when I made that call. So that threw me for a loop. I had planned everything....so having something not go right kinda messed with me. I tried again 15 minutes later and actually got through....only to have my friend ask if I could call back in a few minutes. Yea....that didn't happen. I guess me mentioning that I had 4 hooks in my back didn't seem that important. Gotta love friends!
By now everything was rigged up and it was time to go. Bruce got me attached to the rig and we added a little bit of tension. I'll admit....I was slow. Now that I was actually here and hooked up to everything....I was terrified. It dawned on me at this point that I was going to have to give up control of my body to someone else. That scared me. I haven't given up control completely like that.....in 2 years. So it was a slow process. Everyone was real patient though. I was holding onto Sean and Missa and finally got off the ground.....but only for a few seconds. The pain was more intense than I had imagined it would be. And I just couldn't give up control. And I was upset with myself. I knew I could do better than that. I had gone through way too much shit in my life to let something like a little pain get in my way. I knew I could go up and let go of everyone. I may not stay up long, but I knew I could do i t.
We unhooked me and let me take a break. I ate an apple, smoked a cigarette. Tried to clear my mind again and get into a better mindset. About a half an hour later we decided to give it another go. What can I say, I'm a glutton for punishment. My back was tender. It definitely was going to hurt more. But I'll be damned if that was going to stop me. So we got me rigged back up and put some tension in it and I let my body get readjusted again. This time just holding onto Missa I went up.....and let go. And true, I wasn't up long. But that didn't matter to me. I was finally able to give up control to someone else. And that was all that mattered.
It was a learning experience for me. To those that can do this and stay up for 10 or 15 minutes of whatnot....more power to you. I'm not there yet. I will do it again. I'm too stubborn not to. But everyone whom I spoke to beforehand was right....you can't go into it expecting something.....or you won't get anything out of it. I got what I needed out of mine. And I don't think it's for everyone....but it's amazing to be able to do it.
I couldn't have asked for a better group of people to suspend me. The M.O.M group knows their stuff and are just amazing to work with. I wouldn't trust anyone else to suspend me. And I can't wait to try it again :)