So walking around with 22 piercings as many people reading this will understand, grab's people's attention and usually spawns a lot of nonsensical questions. One of the questions I seem to be asked the most is if I happen to have my ______ pierced. The answer is always yes, until they turn smart-assed and question if I have my ass pierced, to which I used to reply no.
At A Glance Author Anita Contact Anita@bme.anon When It just happened Artist Jake DeSade Studio Bushido Location Calgary, Alberta Until a few days ago I'd never even had the though cross my mind, but on Friday morning at about 3am I started thinking about it for some reason. I realized that the location directly at the top of the "crack" is ideally suited to house a surface bar, and would sit much the same as my lower sternum. Friday afternoon at 1pm after about 5 hours of sleep I raced into Bushido tattoo & piercing, hoping to be the first there to talk to my favorite piercer, Jake. Unfortunately, Jake wasn't going to be there for another hour or so, so I wandered the shop and talked to the tattoo artists and the receptionists while I waited.
Jake arrived and I pounced. I started asking him about the placement, how long of a surface bar we should use, if it would reject, but low and behold, Jake (the man who pierced my friends eyelid) had never seen or heard of such a piercing...
That got us both all excited.
After dealing with all the walk-ins and waiting for my friend to arrive to take pictures of the experience. Finally it was time for my to "sign my life away", and it hit us... What would we call it??? Was there even a name!
After about 20 minutes of deliberation involving Jake, my friend Jenn, two receptionists, a tattoo artist and myself, it was decided. Since it was technically a Glutinous Maximus that was being pierced, we would call it a Maximus Piercing.
This is about when the Adrenaline kicked in. We went into Jake's room and I had to lower my pants, get prep'd and he marked me. Turns out it would have to go a little higher then I would have liked to accommodate the stretching of the skin when I bend, but that's why I went to Jake, he thinks about all of it. After we finished marking where the 3/4" surface bar would sit, Jake changed his gloves and made me lay face down on the table.
I've never been a person to 'chicken out' but oh man, I really considered it. After a few deep breathes he lined up the needle and we went for it...
For the first maybe 10 seconds I felt the worst pain I have ever experienced in my life. Take the normal, dull throbbing pain from most piercings and add in a few nerve shocks that run up your spine and down your legs. After that it was almost an orgasmic torture. It was THE MOST painful experience of my life yet and felt like someone had decided to drive nails into my lower back, but in a way it was really fun for a Masochist. So I clenched up and moaned a little, Jenn took pictures and Jake giggled. It didn't bleed AT ALL, but wow did it burn.
The bar went in fine, the pictures were amazing to look at (and might become the background of Jake's next set of cards) and after a cigarette with Jenn, the price was amazingly low since Jake was so proud to say he did it first (to our knowledge).
The piercing is really actually quite pretty despite the fact I got it to show up people asking if I have my ass pierced, but either way, I love it to death. It's really really tender, but then again, its only Saturday. It's really something I love to have now, but I really REALLY would NOT recommend this to anyone faint of heart or low pain threshold.
Its the first piercing that I have ever had on the 'back of me' so its really going to take some getting used to. I have to sleep face down, keep a really close eye on how my clothes are sitting, and mostly, avoid leaning onto things cause WOW does that ever hurt. But like any piercing, you have to learn to control yourself and take care of it to ensure it stays (and doesn't reject). Jake even told me he wouldn't have done it if he knew I didn't take care of my piercings, but since I do so well, and surface bars really seem to take to me (I have 2 sternums), he absolutely loves to pierce me.
But I love it, I can now honestly say
"Yes, actually, I DO have my assed pierced.... Would you like to see???"