Disclaimer: I'm just some guy. Your mileage may vary.
At A Glance Author the pat When A week ago Artist Mr. Rick Gilmour Studio Adorned Precision Bodypiercing Location Calgary, Alberta I guess my story begins some 6 years ago when first I learned of the possibility of poking a hole and inserting a shiny accessory down under. The idea instantly appealed to me. It took a long while for me to decide what to get done, and even longer to take the plunge and have it done. Looking back (though not too far back,) I'm glad that I chose to wait. I've had several piercings done (in my younger years) that were not properly placed, or were pierced with the wrong jewelry, which is at least partially my fault for not having sought a trustworthy and experienced piercer, and my penis is certainly not an area I would ever want to risk a mishap. I've learned the importance of knowing who is going to pierce you. Knowing their work. Knowing their reputation.
Continuing with the meat of the story as it were; one week ago, I decided it was time to get poked. The time was most certainly right, as I'd secured almost a full week's time off from work, I had the coin to spare and most importantly, I was ready and willing.
I arrived at the shop roughly around 5 o'clock, roughly an hour before closing time, and was delighted to find out that there would be plenty of time to fit me in. I was asked if I had any questions or concerns about the procedure, of which I had but one. Being an uncircumcised male, placement was certainly a bit of an issue. After a rundown of the problems associated with improper placement of a P.A. on an uncircumcised male (which can include *constant* pinching, yikes,) Rick offered to take a look at what I was packing so as to ensure that I wouldn't be stuck with a potentially difficult to heal or even painful piercing. After a quick look, he assured me that we could continue as planned. At this point I became excited and in all honesty a slight bit nervous, because after all, it is a very cherished part of my body we're talking about here. A 10 ga. CBR was chosen as the lucky chunk of steel to be inserted into my dangly friend. It was then time to begin! The wonderful Mr. Gilmour gloved up and set out his tools. The size of the receiving tube caught my eye and having no experience with sounding this made me a tad more nervous. The procedure was then explained to me in full and I was cleaned and marked up. The previously mentioned receiving tube was lubed up and plugged in. I relaxed quite a bit at this point as the insertion of the tube was a lot less traumatic than I had been imagining. At this point I was told in a wonderfully calm and soothing voice that should take five deep breaths and he would proceed. As I exhaled the fifth and final breath the needle shot in. Again, much less traumatic than I had been expecting. Next came a taper, as I was initially pierced with a 12 ga. needle and needed a hole large enough to accommodate a 10 ga. ring. The taper slid through with ease, followed quickly by the jewelry. The entire experience was quick and none too painful. After being fitted with a lovely blue glove complete with maxi pad in the end, pulling up my pants and receiving some aftercare instructions it "\Ãw€ë was time to pay up and head out.
The trip home was also much less traumatic than had been expected. I walked a few blocks with my best friend who had accompanied me to the shop and hopped a bus. I was worried that the rough bus ride may irritate my new piercing, but such was not the case. We decided along the way home to stop at the local organic grocery store where I could purchase some aftercare materials. A friend of mine happened to be working there at the time which gave me a wonderful opportunity to brag about my shiny new penile adornment. I decided to forego another bus ride to get the rest of the way home and instead took a nice half hour walk. As long as I walked slowly there was no pain or real discomfort on the way home.
The next few hours proved to be the worst part of the experience, only because somewhere in that time came the first urination. Ouch. It's been said that the first urination can be worse than the piercing itself and I wholeheartedly agree. It stung like, well, a bad sting.
The following few days were filled with such wonderful things as spotting, uncomfortable erections and having to relearn to pee standing up. I would strongly recommend to those trying to pee standing up after getting a transurethral piercing to make the first attempt in the shower. The added whole as well as the obstruction that the ring causes can certainly direct your urine in new and interesting ways. After initially figuring out the new angle and direction of the flow, I was lucky to be able to compensate and can now successfully pee into a toilet, standing up, all the while not getting any on myself or the floor. From what I've heard this makes me fortunate, as some are doomed to pee sitting down for eternity (well, I guess it isn't *that* bad, but come on!)
All in all it was an eye-opening and most interesting experience. I would recommend it to anyone who can get over the fear of having metal shoved into their urethra and subsequently having a terribly sharp needle driven through the bottom of their penis. Remember kids, it only hurts for a second!