Like many here, I suppose I'm the seemingly normal, mid-thirties, bald guy in khakis and a button down in some non-distinct cube somewhere. Behind said mild-mannered appearance is your run of the mill mild-mannered pervert, piercing ho. Anyhow, as I'm limited to only one body part per story, I suppose I'll just write about the ladder now and save the guiche and nipple fun for when this membership runs out.
At A Glance Author schmerzgarten Contact schmerzgarten@bme.anon When It just happened Artist mostly me with a little help from my wife
So, prior to gaining the confidence to poke myself, I had both nipples, a 4x14gauge ladder, and a PA done, most of which by the folks at the Tattoo Museum in downtown Baltimore - huge kudos to those folks. Well, being part, sorta kinda in a closet way, of the local BDSM community, I was able to procure a bunch of 14 gauge and 12 gauge needles as well as the requisite hardware, e.g. CBRs and barbells. Now, anyone who has been a fan of play-piercings, i.e. 19 - 25 gauges, knows things are going to get out of hand at this point - did I mention I found a whole-sale supplier.
Well, after a shower and shave a few days ago, I decided it was time to get the show on the road and slam this ladder in. So, I popped up a few pictures of some good ole femdom stuff, got a woody, and got out the ruler and a ball-point pen. I set 5 marks, each 1/2 wide, and 3/4 inches apart. Now, though I rank average according to Cosmo - thanks for the ego boost, I've never been a fan of the little pecker down below, and this experience brought said grumpy level to new heights. That little SOB shrank to the size of a three-year-old left in a pool too long with the first needle.
Now, having failed miserably at the first attempt, the needle simply refusing to go in any way straight, I decided to recoupe and plan the endeavor for another day, preferably mid-day as break from that technical morass for which I'm paid. Said day came and again came out came the femdom porn, the ball-point pen, the ruler, the needles, and a decided resolve around 2:30 in the afternoon. Yet again, perfect measurements, a solid plan, and again I'm faced with the beanie weenie of peckers upon the first poke.
Well, the little bastard was getting steel today like it or not. I decided to start at the base, back by those cannon balls my grandfather gave me for nuts. It was so easy I felt cheated. In it went, a breath, then I saw the needle right through the marked spot on the other side. Perfect! I greased up the CBR in some neosporin, slid it through without issue, and hooked in the ball (This in comparison to the guiche cry, bitch, fuss, effort of finding the out-going hole).
Great, I was ready for poke number two. And, what did I see on that rat-bastard I call a pecker, nothing! All the marks were gone. Alrighty, up comes the BDSM porn again, trying to think really bad thoughts, ok I had a winner, grab the ruler and pen again. Effort number two was likewise a swooosh, right through the exit mark. I put in the ring, snapped in the bead, and got ready for round three. Alas, what do I see when I look down, you guessed it, nothing but a clean, sweaty beanie weanie with no marks. Now, normally I'm a fan of women in boots, but this shit is getting old.
At this point, I was indeed wanting a drink but knew I still had work to do after my, by the will of Dionysus, effort had been completed successfully. Thankfully, KaZaa has offered up some good video clips which I could extrapolate into good marital fun, so dot dot with the ruler and I was back in business. Slam, bam, thank you ma'am, three and four were down without issue. Yes, I was definitely riding the endorphin high at this point.
Now comes the penultimate hatred of happy willy down yonder. Note: please do use neosporin or some type of appropriate lubricant.) However, the one that needed to be on that thick piece of skin which expands when you get a woody proved pivotal. Endorphins raging, hands shaking, dick the size of pea-pod, marks disappearing, that rotten SOB just sat there with just the bare end of the needle sticking out. I really think I sat that pushing and fearing the last one would never come through. Really, my cock was about pushed to my thigh. Finally, breath, breath, POP, and it was through and I was worried my wife would find me passed out. Holy Hell that was painful. Alas, it has been almost 3 days and all are healing wonderfully.