In August of 2004, I decided to get my scrotum pierced. It was not an easy or simple decision. The idea of adorning them in a potentially painful way was something I feared. I have been pierced on several different occasions, stretched those piercings, and hung from temporary hooks. So the pain really wasn't the issue; it was the adornment that I feared. I see genital modification as something perceived as "scandalous at best" to the mainstream world. Despite my past experiences with body modification, I still had a difficult time claiming my genitals as my own. . I was too busy worrying, "What will they think of me when they find out?" I now understand that this is irrational thinking. I have been doing my best to claim my body as my own for several years now and through piercing, tattooing, and body suspension I have grown closer to a more idealized self image. However, this isn't a lesson in social view of self image so I will not delve any deeper into that realm, for now. This is about love. Those that know me recognize this to be true in every aspect of my life.
At A Glance Author Atom Contact Atom@bme.anon IAM Atom When A year ago Artist Sarai Studio New York Adorned Location NYC So in August, with the confidence, support, and money of a loved one I agreed to have my genitals altered. Anne has been more of an influence to my psyche than she may know. My reasons for doing this were not entirely based on her constant nagging, "I have my triangle done. When are you going to get something?" Although it was a motivating factor for sure. My self image at stake, we headed out into lower Manhattan with the plan of doing something as a birthday gift. I was apprehensive, but in the back of my mind I wanted to claim my genitals as my own. I also wished to shed the stigma of doing positive things for yourself. For some reason we were unable to have Brian Decker at Sacred do it that specific day, my birthday. So after finding out Brian was unavailable, we went to the next best place we could think of: New York Adorned. Anne and I made an agreement that if I liked the vibe and the piercer, I would go ahead and have it done. We met with Sarai, who was spending some time working at the shop. We discussed the idea of getting two hafadas and the cost. She told us they weren't her favorite piercing because of the high rejection rate. "Why don't you want to get a more substantial genital piercing?" she asked. I was set on the look and safety of the hafadas so that is what I stuck with. I was not ready to get something as scary as an apadravya. We left the shop to walk around so I could make up my mind. The vibe was right; I liked Sarai and wouldn't mind if she was the one to pierce me. After a little mental preparation, Anne and I headed back ready to go through with the piercings.
The pain of the actual piercing was not nearly as bad as I had hyped myself up to think. It was a quick pinch and then I had two hafadas with 12g curved barbells adorning each side of my scrotum. I was energized and happy with the way everything went. Still, the idea of going with this 'safer' piercing was in my mind. Would I ever be brave enough to alter the shaft of my penis? Only time would tell.
The healing period was marked by one clear fact that had been an excuse of mine not to have the procedure done in the first place: I would be unable to ride my bike for quite some time, perhaps weeks. This was a damaging blow to me; my transportation around the city I live in is my bike. I love my bike. I love the idea of using a form of transportation that doesn't pollute, makes me stronger, and more importantly, makes me feel really good about myself. It was time for a bicycle probationary period. I was less than thrilled about the whole idea. I believe it was just over a week before I was back on the bike trying to ride it. It was not a smart idea, but when you do something so often and like it, the difficulties of letting it go, even for a short while, can be tough. Sitting on new piercings was not a good idea. Within 2 months of riding with my hafadas, the left one was sore enough that I needed to remove it. Bicycling is a major part of my life and it took priority over the piercing. I kept the right hafada in until April of 2005, and in the meantime stretched it to an 8g with some ease. I switched back to 10g periodically due to irritation caused by the heavier 8g ring. I enjoyed having it sexually; it would often stimulate me with subtle nudges or unexpected touches. Unfortunately, the larger ring made it migrate. Even after downsizing, there was nothing I could do come early April. I made the decision to remove it, but not without thought of replacing it somehow. Another week of bicycle probation was definitely in my future.