Hitting forty and life was starting to feel kind of dull. Hopefully, you younger kids haven't gotten to that point where every day starts to feel like last, but the older crowd know's what I'm talking about. So I got it in my head to do a piercing, my first ever. Humoring myself that I'm something of a professional sort, I wanted it to be one that could be hidden easily. I was a bit nervous about the pain and I put off doing anything for a couple of weeks, but having gotten a vasectomy a couple of years earlier I finally figured I could handle the pain of a scrotum piercing, so I settled on doing a hafada. Over to the farm supply store for some needles. A great place to get needles; cheap, sterile and the cute counter girls figure you're just inoculating your horse, and maybe you are, in a manner of speaking. They've got 16 gauge and 14 gauge needles so I get several 14 gauge needles, an inch and a half long, sealed in their own little plastic holders, nice and conve nient. I even get a little thrill as the tight t-shirted and cowboy booted, teenaged, cowgirl clerk gets the needles from the locked cabinet, knowing that I'm going to be shoving one through my ball sac soon. OK, so it's a cheap thrill, but hey I take them where I can get them. Next I try to go down to the local tattoo shop but they're not open, hmm, maybe it's a sign? The next morning I shave my ball sac in the shower, get it all nice and smooth and later that day I try the tattoo shop again. This time he's open so I pick up a couple of 14ga circular barbells about a 1/2 inch in diameter.
At A Glance Author MTRider Contact MTRider@bme.anon When A year ago That evening the kids and wife are in bed, I can hear her snoring and I know nothing short of an earthquake is going to wake her. I take some rubbing alcohol and sterilize one of the barbells as best I can. Wash my hands and scrotum with a washcloth soaked in alcohol and I'm ready. I sacrifice one needle to make sure that the end of the barbell is going to fit inside, it does, just barely, the threads catching nicely on the inside of the needle. I get a fresh needle out, stretch out my ball sac with my fingers and thumb and start pushing the needle through. It would have been handy to have a clamp, but my mind is made up now and I don't want to wait for however long it would take to order one. The spot I've decided on is just at the base of my cock, just above the vasectomy scar, through the seam of my sac. Stings a bit but it's nowhere near as bad as when that damn doctor cut me open and put a clamp on my vans deferens, holy shit did that hurt.
So now I've got a shiny needle stuck clean through my sac and my hands start shaking, my heart's pounding and I'm thinking, 'head rush, added bonus'. The thought of one of the kids waking up and walking into the bathroom occurs to me, and just how do you explain that to a five year old? Takes a couple minutes and my hands have steadied enough to get the end of the barbell into the needle and shove it back through. Sticks a bit, it's a little harder to get it back out than it was going in, but eventually the barbell comes out the other side and the needle falls to the floor.
Some bleeding ensues, not much, but enough drip of the bottom of my sac and make a puddle on the floor. I get the ball back on the barbell, clean up the blood and it looks good. On goes some neosporin and a bandage and off I go to bed. The adrenalin is still running in my blood so it takes a while to fall asleep but eventually I drift off.
I show it to the wife the next morning, before the kids are up, figuring she's going to go ballistic and have me committed, but she likes it so much that she fucks me right then and there and I'm thinking 'all right, another added bonus!'
For the next week or so I clean it a couple times a day with rubbing alcohol and a qtip. No swelling, no bruising and I'm thinking that was easy.
I like it so much that in the next couple of weeks I do four more to make a nice ladder down the seam of my balls. Unfortunately, by now the wife thinks that I've gone off the deep end and isn't giving me tail for each one any more, so much for that bonus, oh well, easy come, easy go. The pain gets a little more intense as I get farther and farther down the scrotum. Eventually, I swapped out the barbells for 5 12ga CBR's.
Standard disclaimer...
Unless you've got an autoclave in your spare room, Don't try this yourself. Obviously, it's impossible to get all the materials sterile and there is a real risk of getting an infection.
coming soon 'A Royal Encounter with Prince Albert'