Its 9:50 pm on a Sunday night and I'm sitting in front of my computer with my penis floating in a glass of slightly salty water. This is not the sort of thing most mortals do on their Sunday nights. My mother certainly did not raise me to indulge in these sorts of activities yet I find myself here.
At A Glance Author anonymous Contact anonymous@bme.anon When It just happened Artist Brian Studio Sacred Tattoo Location Canal Street, NYC I have been interested in getting a genital piercing for a number of years. A number of factors have kept me from going out and fulfilling my desire, conservative girlfriends, lack of funds, and other worries kept that desire lurking in the back of my mind, quietly plotting for the day it would be fulfilled.
Fulfillment came two days before my 28th birthday. I had mentioned to my roommate that I wanted to give myself an ampallang. As she was a rather close friend she was familiar with my penis and suggested that I get a frenum instead. After going onto a number of sites, reading experiences, and taking a good, long, hard look at myself, I decided that a frenum would be the better choice. I have a small head and wide shaft so the ampallang would be overwhelming and unbalanced for my penis. A great deal of piercings I've seen seem to be chosen more for the desire to have a large hunk of metal stuck through the body than any thought into how it might look.
I ended up at Sacred Tattoo based on their good reputation and the piercer's friendly demeanor on the phone. After shoving our way through the Chinatown crowds we came into the studio where we met the piercer, Brian. After speaking with him for a bit about the piercing I felt very comfortable and browsed through some jewelry while he washed up and sterilized the work area.
My penis went through the middle of a surgical napkin and was sitting there on a blue background like a shriveled little worm. This is not one of those times in your life when you really should feel the need to present yourself as a raging stallion. The fear and the anxiety with having a strange man jab a piece of 10 gauge sharpened steel through your john thomas is enough to shrink even the most jaunty of members.
The actual process was lengthier than I expected. Brian carefully marked out what he though would be a good entry and exit point and asked for my approval. After getting the thumbs up, he proceeded to mark out the line that the barbell should travel through. Interestingly he used a pair of calipers to make the measurement in order to choose the jewelry. The methodical, focused manner in which the piercer went through the entire process was quite reassuring.
My fear came to a peak as he positioned the steel tube that would catch the needle on the far side of the piercing. He took his time placing the needle until he found an angle and placement that he liked. Watching a razor sharp hallow needle wave and twist around your penis is a little disconcerting to say the least. Finally the traditional deep breath and a smooth motion and there was a savage flash of pain. It was just a flash so there was no time to really jerk or even react before it was gone. The tube was withdrawn and there was a needle sticking through my penis, the weight of the needle causing it to tilt rakishly to one side. Pushing the needle out, followed immediately by the bar took another second and then the ball was being screwed down.
The anxiety of waiting for the needle was far worse than the actual pain. Thirty hours later the occasional twinge is all I can feel. Soaking it in saline completely removed the minimal blood from the jewelry and I haven't had any problems. My nose and ears bled far worse and were painful for days after having them pierced with lighter gauge jewelry. I haven't had a chance to really explore having a frenum as I want to keep my hands away until its had a chance to heal up. Given my usual schedule of masturbation its been more of a matter of desexualizing my penis as it needs to heal. I didn't think of this before the piercing but its been interesting. My lack of a sexual partner only strengthens this feeling of desexualization as there's no motivation to "take it for a test drive" as soon as I can stand the pain of fucking with a fresh piercing.
Any writing on body modification spends a great deal of ink on how body modifications change the attitude towards the body. I find this to be true but its a very personal experience and I think one can only describe the process of gaining one's modifications. Trying to describe the changes that one feels in their attitude towards their own body is not so simple. I have twenty eight years of experience in my own flesh and I can't describe how this changes my struggles with self-image and sexuality. Its quiet. I think that many people expect a flash of light with each experience and a wild change in their life. There was a long time between first deciding I wanted the piercing to actually getting it done. I expect it will be a long time to fully explore how its changed my perception of my body.