I've been intrigued about piercings for a while.
At A Glance Author Big M Contact mgstewa@juno.com When A week ago Artist Chrissy Studio 23rd Street Body Piercing Location Oklahoma City I'd researched on the internet and decided I wanted an apadravya. A Prince Albert just didn't strike me as very 'secure' and an apadravya had a kind of aesthetic presence about it.
I had already called the local piercer to ask about the cost. When I told him what I wanted he said, "Sure, man! Come on down and be sure to bring a crying towel." When I asked if I needed an appointment he balked and advised me to go to "23rd Street" in Oklahoma City. "That's a pretty advanced piercing, man."
I checked out their web-site and liked what I saw, so last week, I made the hour long drive to The City. The girl behind the counter asked if she could help me.
"I want an apadravya." I said.
Her eyes widened a bit and she paused.
"Okay, uh I have some paperwork I need you to fill out."
We finished all the preliminaries and she took me back to one of the 'clean rooms'. She had me drop my pants, put on the 'dental bib' with the hole in it and made all the measurements and markings. Then she put the clamp on the head and told me to start taking deep breaths.
"In through your nose and out through your mouth."
Now, I've done some pretty stupid stuff in my time. I've accidentally shoved a knife into my hand down to the bone. I've put cigarettes out on the backs of my hands on a dare. I've even done a little do-it-yourself surgery with a buck knife.
This fucking hurt!
I cannot describe the amount of pain I felt when she shoved that needle through me! Words just cannot do it justice!
The endorphins slammed into me hard. It felt like the temperature of the room went up a good twenty or thirty degrees.
"There," she said. "All done." "You did real good. Didn't even suck in any air when the needle went through."
"Yeah," I told her. "And I didn't kick you either."
The endorphins were still working me over and I felt like I was going to puke. My head started getting light and I could see that familiar hazy tunnel starting to form around my vision. I was thinking, "Jesus, I must have been fucking crazy to do this!"
"For the record," I said. "I'm starting to get light headed."
She told me that happened sometimes. She lowered the end of the table and I laid down on my back.
"Do you want a drink?" she asked.
"Sure."
She left the room for a second and returned with a Dr. Pepper. The sugar tasted fantastic and my system started to return to normal. I was drenched in sweat while she finished wrapping everything up and putting on the infamous glove. I was feeling much better now and she supervised while I got my pants back up.
She asked me to sit in the lobby for a minute or two to make sure I was going to be alright. I asked her if she minded me stepping out front for a smoke and she said I probably needed one.
After the cigarette I finished off the Dr. Pepper and then had to go to the bathroom. I pulled off the glove and the gauze and took a look at my mutilated penis. This is going to feel real great, I thought. I sat down and proceeded to piss blood and urine. It burned into the piercing and smelled like a used tampon. There was a long stringy clot hanging from the ball on the bottom that wouldn't let go. When I was done, I cleaned up with some toilet paper. The gauze and glove where shot, so I wrapped up with a couple of paper towels.
I returned to the lobby and sat back down. I listened to Johnny Cash tell his dad, "Now you gonna die!" Chrissy was helping some other customers, but eventually I caught her eye.
"Can I go?" I asked.
"Sure. You look like your doing fine." She said.
I walked out to my truck, lit up another smoke and began the hour drive back home. My new piercing reminded me of it's existence with every pothole.
It quit bleeding a couple of days ago. I had to throw away the shorts I was wearing, but only got a drop or two on my jeans. I went though a box of gauze and a twelve pack of condoms over the weekend.
My friends at work are astounded at the 'old man' and my wife is pissed as hell. I am still walking very careful and don't get up from my computer unless I have to.
All in all...
I like it a lot!
I think I'll get me a wand with a captive ring on the end next.
Nobody ever laid on their deathbed thinking, "You know, I should have spent more time at the office."
It's not the years in your life; it's the life in your years!
As Jim Morrison noted, "Nobody gets out alive!"
DO IT! Jump!